An inseparable part of a wedding is giving gifts to the happy couple. Each guest should be prepared with a gift to present after the wedding ceremony. Sometimes gifts can be given before the wedding, if they come from the immediate family of the couple – that is their parents. Traditionally the bride receives the most attention before and during a wedding and her relatives and friends are curious what gifts she will receive and from whom. But what about from the mother of the groom? I decided to research both wedding traditions and etiquette to find out what is typical and expected.
So, does the mother of the groom gives the bride a gift? Traditionally, the mother of the groom does give a gift to the bride. Suitable gifts include a family possession given from one generation to the next. Such types of gifts show that the bride is being accepted as a part of the family. Another example could be a photo album, a memory box, cherished family recipes and many more sentimental gifts which show that the bride is a part of her new family.
The gifts may not always be material ones. Parts of the wedding can be paid by the groom’s parents such as the marriage license, the official fees, the bride’s bouquet, boutonnieres and corsages for immediate family members or some treats at the reception.
These are all items that are traditionally paid by the groom’s parents. These, gifts, however, are for the couple and are not individual ones.
The options can be many – some of them more traditional, others not so much but they are all emotional gifts that bring memories and sentimental value for the years to come.
Let us now take a closer look at the options open to the mother of the groom when it comes to getting the bride a gift, from those traditional recommendations to those more modern.
At the end we will also be looking at whether the bride should be getting a gift for the mother of the groom. So be sure to keep on reading to get all the information you need!
Can The Mother Of The Groom Get The Bride A Gift?
Traditionally, the mother of the groom does give the bride a gift. It is a custom for the mother to give the bride a gift as a gesture from one woman to another from two families.
Such gift is a symbolic sign of unity of two different families and are a welcoming gesture of acceptance of the bride as part of the other family.
Some options for gifts are very traditional and have been practised for hundreds of years. Others are more fit to our contemporary times.
Thankfully, there are plenty of options available and what to get is going to be down to personal preferences and the distinct relationship these two important people share.
What Should The Mother Of The Groom Get The Bride?
Let’s look at some examples of what can be suitable gifts for the bride from the mother of the groom!
Amongst the most traditional and typical presents to be given are:
Family Possession (Heirloom)
The mother of the groom can give the bride an old family possession that has been passed on from one generation to another.
Such a possession can be a grandmother’s rosary or a handkerchief knitted by a great-aunt. This type of a gift is a great way to show the bride that she is already accepted as a part of the family.
The mother can either give the bride a piece of jewellery that has been in the family for generations or she can buy her a piece to complete her set.
It can also be a piece of her wedding jewellery set. It does not have to be anything very expensive – it is more about the gesture than the monetary value of the piece itself.
Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed
An old wedding custom is for the bride to wear something old, something new and something borrowed during the ceremony as part of her dress ensemble.
The mother can either give her an old family treasure such as jewellery or decoration to add to her (the bride’s dress) or she can buy her an element of her dress such as the veil, the bouquet or a tiara.
A memory box is another traditional gift the mother of the groom can give to the bride. It is easy to make, it is not expensive and carries a life long-lasting sentimental value.
The box can contain photos, favorite family items, toys, awards, artwork, certificates and memorabilia of the groom from his childhood days.
Basically anything that carries sentimental family value and brings back memories can be placed inside.
A great way to welcome the bride into the family and make her a part of it is to share old and cherished family recipes with her.
Nowadays, there are great and easy ways to print a personalized cooking book. The groom’s favorite dishes can be highlighted and space can be left for the future daughter-in-law to add some of her own.
Traditions are a lovely thing but we live in a very modern time which allows for thinking and acting outside any well-established frames.
Let’s look at some gift ideas that are a bit more unconventional!
Professional Photo Shoot
This is the age of Facebook, Instagram, endless photo shoots and sharing of moments. Cherished moments are regularly captured by a camera and shared with family and friends, sometimes even on daily basis.
Certainly, the bride would enjoy a professional photo shoot in her dress. Giving her a professional photo shoot is an excellent gift that she will remember, appreciate and happily keep.
Decorate A Room
One of the best gifts to give is to decorate a room in the couple’s new home. The mother of the groom can discuss it with the bride, set a budget, choose the furnishing and can go shopping together.
It is a very useful and practical gift and at the same time fun, unusual and can be a bonding activity between the two ladies.
The honeymoon is yet another pleasant but a big expense that the couple has to arrange. Instead of giving anything material, the mother of the groom can pay for the couple’s honeymoon or at least cover part of the expenses.
These are some great ideas for a gift that the mother of the groom can give to her future daughter-in- law.
No matter what is chosen, however, it is important always to have in mind the bride’s personality and personal preferences.
When Should The Mother Of The Groom Give The Bride A Gift?
The time when the mother of the groom gives a gift to the bride is optional and is up to each family individually. It also depends on the type of gift.
If it is from the more traditional ones, it is a good idea to give it shortly before the wedding. If it is a piece of jewellery or an element of her wedding dress that the bride will wear during the ceremony, then the gift should be given on the wedding day itself.
If the present is a photo shoot, honeymoon, home decor improvement and anything alike, then obviously it has to be given before the wedding.
Since the bride is the one that leads everything, such details should be decided upon her discretion.
Does The Bride Give A Gift To The Mother Of The Groom?
Since the mother of the groom puts as much effort in the wedding as the bride and her mother, it is nice to give back the gesture and give the mother of the groom a present as well.
It is more of a thank you to express gratitude for her efforts and not so much a well-established tradition. The gift should be of the same value as the mother’s gift to the bride, if possible.
Some good ideas may include giving a personalized gift such as a photo album with pictures of the future spouses, jewellery or a piece of artwork.
To sum up, the mother of the groom does give a gift to the bride. It is a tradition that has been around of decades and people are used to it. The gift can be simpler one but carrying a family value and emotions or it can be more connected to the wedding, the couple’s future home or relieving some wedding expenses.
Ideas for a gift can be memorabilia, heirloom, jewellery, something, old or new, memory box, a personalised book with family recipes, photo shoot, room decoration, honeymoon and anything else that the bride (or the couple) would love to receive.
Depending on the type of gift, the present can be handed either shortly before or after the wedding day. As a thank you gesture the bride can also give a gift to the mother of the groom of the same value, if possible.
Finally, the bride’s personality has to be taken in consideration always and it is recommendable to discuss with her in advance what present she would most enjoy.
Hey, I’m Allison – a recent bride, an expectant mother and the chief editor here at Everlasting Occasion. Here I document all the knowledge and experience I accumulated while researching and planning my dream wedding and ahead of our new baby. Here, I try to answer those many questions couples have when planning their dream wedding, while equally, helping expectant parents ahead of their new arrival!