The choosing of the best man is one of the most important decisions that you will need to make for your wedding. For some, this decision can be a simple and straightforward one. For others it can be a little more challenging. Either way, one common questions that couples often ask is whether or not the best man can be married or if they need to be single to undertake this role. I spent some time researching to find out exactly what is possible.
So, can the best man be married? The best man can be married or single; there is no formal requirement either way. However, the best man does have many important responsibilities and duties that need to be fulfilled. For this reason, there may be benefits for choosing a single best man; such as the increased likelihood of them being available for bachelor party planning and to be with the groom the night before and the morning of the wedding.
While the groom traditionally asks a relative or a close friend to be their best man; it is ultimately up to them who they choose. Sometimes, the partner or spouse of a bridesmaid is chosen and this seems to work well for some couples.
Irregardless of who you do choose to be your best man, the most important thing is that they are reliable, supportive and available both in the planning of the wedding, the celebrations and the day itself.
Let us now take a closer look at the topic in further detail. We will also be looking at those other similar and related questions that you may have.
So be sure to keep on reading to get all the information you need!
Does The Best Man Have To Be Single?
The best man does not have to be single. In fact, the best man role can be undertaken by anyone whom the groom feels worthy of such an honor.
For this reason, the best man could be a single man, a married man, a single woman, a married woman etc. There are no rules which suggest otherwise, and many people feel confident to make their decision accordingly.
The same also applies for the bride and her maid of honor. Although, if she is married she is referred to as a ‘matron of honor’. Nevertheless, the role is the same and it could be a brother, male cousin or even a male friend.
What ultimately matters is that the groom selects and identifies a special person whom they can count on and will want to be with in the run up to and during their wedding.
Married vs Single Best Man
Whether you choose somebody married or single to be your best man, is going to come down to a number of factors and individual circumstances.
What should drive your decision is whom is most special to you, whom you want to honor and those whom you can rely upon and trust. Equally, they should want to stand by the best mans side and do all they can to ensure you have a truly special day.
That being said, if you are on the fence and are not sure whether to decide between one or the other, there are some things to consider which may may your decision easier.
Generally, single men have more time on their hands. And time is of the essence when it comes to wedding planning.
Take the bachelor party as one such example. This is traditionally organized by the best man. A single best man may find that they are more willing and able to commit to the planning of such an event. The result could mean a more enjoyable bachelor party for all invovled.
Equally, they may have more availability for the events leading up to your wedding; not needing to take into account the plans and commitments of their other half.
On the night before the wedding and the morning of the wedding day itself, a single best man is also more likely to be available, especially without a lot of planning in advance. A married man may have a young child whom they cannot leave during these times, or they may be less enthusiastic about the idea altogether.
However, when it comes to the best mans speech; a single best man may not give a speech as sentimental, or from a position of love.
This is where a married man could shine, being able to draw from their own experiences in love and from their own wedding day itself.
These are all just some thoughts to think about and consider. They are general and will not apply to all people of either relationship status.
What is most important is that you consider the personalities and general availability of both potential types of best man.
What Is A Married Best Man Called?
A married best man uses the same title of ‘best man’. This does not change regardless of whether he is single or married; so they will always be addressed in this way.
However, you are open to change the name of this role if you desired.
Some people refer to their married best men as their ‘male matron of honor’ (the male equivalent of a married maid of honor).
Whereas others even opt for the groomsman of honor.
Either way, the duties typically remain the same and it is ultimately down to preference.
Can A Groomsman Be Married?
Groomsmen, along with bridesmaids, can be both married and single. Again, their relationship status does not matter.
What does matter is that you care for your groomsmen, they care for you and they are willing and able to plan and support you leading up to and during your special day.
So, regarding their duties and responsibilities they will need to be able to:
- Rent or purchase a suit/accessories.
- Be available and support pre-wedding activities such as the couples shower and rehearsal dinner.
- Help plan/pay for the bachelor party/stag do, following the direction of the best man.
- Decorate the getaway car
Groomsmen do have less responsibility than do the bridesmaids, but they should be the people with whom the groom wants to honor.
It is also possible that a groomsman is married to one of the bridesmaids. While they certainly do not need to be couples, it can work great for your wedding photos and for the pairings when walking down the aisle.
Choosing a best man is not always the easiest decision that you will need to make. There are a lot of things to take into account, but whether they are single or married is not one of them.
Either can work, as can a number of other options such as choosing a women.
What is most important is that you honor the right person. They should be somebody who means a lot to the groom and/or the bride. They should also be an appropriate choice; willing and able to take on the significant responsibilities the role brings.
- The best man is usually in charge of the bachelor party/stag do.
- They need to understand the wedding process,
- They need to support the groom with whatever they need; from getting ready to providing advice,
And last, but by no means least. They need to give an entertaining yet suitable speech.
Whoever you feel deserves and can undertake the role, should surely be in consideration.
Hey, I’m Allison – a recent bride, an expectant mother and the chief editor here at Everlasting Occasion. Here I document all the knowledge and experience I accumulated while researching and planning my dream wedding and ahead of our new baby. Here, I try to answer those many questions couples have when planning their dream wedding, while equally, helping expectant parents ahead of their new arrival!